I am Fortune's fool.

My computer is broken. Hopefully, it is what I think it is and then it won't be so expensive. I finally found a shop that would fix a Gateway after going to 4 different places. It's amazing how accomplished I felt after getting it to the shop. I was walking around thinking, "Look at me. I have things to do. I'm walking around scary areas of town I've never been. I'm so cool."

It's only because I've been cooped up in my flat for so long. I've never had a cleaner apartment. I cook for myself everyday. Luckily, my ipod isn't broken. I'm glad I really like those songs because I'll be listening to them a lot. I also have some podcasts. In case you all have never listened to the episode of This American Life, "What I learned from Television". Please go back through the archives and find it. No matter how many times I listen to it I always feel warm inside after it's over.

So, I have to leave you here until 2010. Tomorrow, my Kiwi flatmate and my roommate are still away for the holiday. Myself, my Russain flatmate and her boyfriend are going to make dinner. I'm not sure what the plan is for night time, but I got a pretty skirt to wear. I feel good about that. I usually try to dress-up, but I don't have much to work with here. It's all part of my lesson in life that often less is more.

Happy New Year! Here's one of the songs from my ipod. I do recommend this album.

Boże Narodzenie. Here's the Deal.

Polish people have two days when they give presents. The first is on the 6th of December. This is St. Nicholas day. Good children wake in the morning to find candy and presents either in their shoes or under their pillow. However, although this holiday is observed, it pales in comparison to the birthday of Jesus.

On the 24th of December, the children look for the first star to appear (in remembrance of the star of Bethlehem). Once they see it the Christmas dinner may begin. They begin by sharing a holy wafer and wish each other Christmas greetings. Apparently, this is an extremely emotional event in the evening because with it they find their unity with each other and Christ.

Once they break bread it's time for the dinner. The table is set with a white tablecloth that has hay under it. This is to remember where Jesus was born. There is always an extra place set in the case that there is an unexpected visitor. This is a night where everybody is welcome.

The dinner is comprised of 12 dishes. These dishes include, but aren't limited to, barszcz with dumplings (as seen in the picture), mushroom soup, herring, fried carp (served first), peirogies, sauerkraut, compote, and cakes. Everyone has to try a little of everything.

Once dinner is complete the caroling can begin. They sing while they wait for Santa to come. The presents either arrive by Santa himself, are left one the doorstep in a bag, or surprisingly show up under the tree. Then at midnight they go to church to celebrate the birth of Jesus. Everyone prays and sings.

On a personal note, I went to the mass. I would describe it as a marathon of boredom. I'll let you all know when I talk to you exactly how boring it was. That's pretty much it. The town is absolutely dead on Christmas day. I watched from my window and there was not a single car on the street.

I hope everyone has a great time with your friends and family as we work our way towards New Year's Eve. This is my favorite holiday next to Thanksgiving. So party your little hearts out.

Themed Out...

with my a clip from my favorite childhood movie.



I am a dork.

Once Again!

Here we are...once again in the holiday of all holidays. The great time to give from your heart and reflect on the closing year. I will spend my holidays reflecting constantly, and trying to forgive myself for my own harsh criticism. When I'm not doing that, I will be placing you all on a pedestal and kicking myself for not being more like you. At least for not living up to my own potential to make you all proud of me. Honestly, it's a good thing. I know that really you are all proud of me no matter what I do, but this is how I thrive. By doing so, I am busily compiling a list of resolutions for the following year. It should go something like this:

1. Quit smoking
2. Quit hoarding
3. Tone down my clothing
4. Stop picking on people
5. Work out more often
6. Eat better
7. Be cooler
8. Be more creative
9. Be more assertive
ETC.

Typical things that you would expect to be on a list of this nature. I believe that if I can accomplish at least the top three I will be a success. In the coming days I'm going to pick 3 things to get rid of each day until New Years Eve. I packed a retarded amount of shit when I came here. Daily, I ask myself, "What were you thinking?" And I know what I was thinking. "Maybe." Well, no more "maybe" for this baby. It's all yes or no. Life is just a process of acquiring a bunch of stuff that we all think we need, but don't. It's not our fault. I blame advertising. It's ever so subtle in insisting that we all could be just a little bit better if we owned whatever product they are pushing. I for one am a serious victim of this. Whenever I feel down I try to buy my way out of the problem instead of directly addressing it. I'm not sure that I will ever be able to escape the hold advertising has on my mind. But, I have a lot of hope that I've undone some of my subconscious impulses by living here in Poland. Obviously the signs can't hurt me here because I can't read them. Perhaps I can take this back with me to the U.S. and hold on to it in an effort to actually invest in something.

I think a fantastic example of this subliminal fuckery is seen during the shopping season. I watched my roommate try on all the scarves she bought as gifts and insist that she actually needed one too. (Xuane, I mean this in the most loving way. That green scarf looks great on you.) I've done the same thing. Go shopping and buy presents for myself instead of others, but why? I don't need those things. I just want them. I want them so badly that I won't even wait to see if someone else got them as a present for me. It's terrible. I'm going to add this to my resolution list, and I encourage you all to do the same thing. I know that Xuane and I are not the only ones.

Anyway, all of this was just an introduction for me to put up some Christmas links for you all to enjoy when you're spending time together without me. Don't cry for me, North Carolina. I'm a big girl and I'm learning to appreciate the important things in life. Look forward to an extremely educational Christmas Bonanza on Poland culture tomorrow. Enjoy the links and your figgy pudding. Wishing you the Happiest of Holidays from my little Christmas heart!

http://www.viceland.com/wp/2009/12/meet-the-sciortinos/

http://www.akqa.com/happychristmas/

http://blog.elfster.com/2009/12/16/homemade-snow-globes-brighten-any-home/

Christmas!

Howells, I have the ornaments. They are extremely breakable. What do I do with them?

Christmas is fun, and so is living with people.

Don't you wish you were getting a present like this from me?





Wrapped like this.




Since I'm not writing a blog because of the party. Please enjoy these pictures of me being a clutz after leaving the mustache party. We decided that it would be a better idea to eat the food we bought for breakfast for a late night snack. P.S. My roommate is currently trying to use the excess rice from dinner last night to glue her wrapping paper together.

I'm sorry...

I promise things sometimes, and then I disappoint. I know I said I was going to write an exciting blog, but I failed to do so. Right after I posted that last entry, the internet went out in the entire building for the rest of the evening, and most of the following day. My life is like an emotional roller-coaster right now. Bare with me. Some days are diamonds and some days are stones, but here there is no rhyme or reason. I'm trying hard to laugh at it all, but I want a hug. Unfortunately, Poland is fresh out of those. Two more months, and then I will weep as I nestle into the love that you all have afforded me. Until then, I will eat nails for breakfast whilst being punched in the arm to gain the strength I need to endure these mean streets.

I'm writing this entry as a consolation. I can't write a great blog tonight because I have to read an article on nationalism and group identification. Then I have to review how to speak Polish so I can stop staring down the student teachers in hatred of their lesson plans. I promise to not make promises I can't keep. Stay tuned, further intelligence will arrive.

You Are The Winner!

....of my heart! I'm so over that dog now that I found you little man.



I posted this yesterday, but I must have forgotten to actually post it. Today is the day, maybe. I talked to my father yesterday instead of writing the blog.

One more thing for today.

I moved to a nicer room. It's higher up with new windows. This means I have a better view of the city and I can't hear what is happening on the streets anymore. No more dogs constantly barking and sirens constantly blaring. Even the beds are a little more comfortable. Not comfortable, just not as loud and spring loaded as the last bed. I'm going to reconsider Poland tomorrow morning after sleeping in a quiet room. Tomorrow, I have the day off. I'm making breakfast with my friends because they're my new neighbors. I'll finish moving and then.....I'm going to write a really exciting blog.

Dear Diary,

No one reads this everyday. I am basically talking to myself. We are awesome. You're my best friend, because you are me.

Love,

Marlowe

This is just adorable.

I don't like this anymore.

I want a job. Where is my money? My trip was fun. I can't talk about it yet. The absence of my money has depressed me. I need you all to call me and tell me I'm special, and remind me that it is all worth it.

I also need to be encouraged to continue to learn Polish. I hate it. Today we learned the verb- to want, chceść. Let me type the sounds of it and then you can all practice it. H-S-eshcht, but don't emphasis the t. Once you get that right you can practice this sentence. Ja chcę książkę [Ya H-S-ewyn ka-sh-aown-szh(like vision)-keywn. I want a book. That is the easiest conjugation. Now, add in all this other bullshit that never makes any sense because they teach you the normal version and then all your examples are irregular. And! They talk to you constantly in Polish, but remember that all you know are verbs because they don't teach you nouns. Seriously, what is going on? I have to take a test on this. It is a retarded way to learn a language.

I have a suggestion. Why not teach us two or three verbs at a time, and then nouns that are related? That way we can logically create a sentence. If the language is difficult this might make it more understandable. That's not all. I have another suggestion. Why don't we teach a rule of grammar and then use it in examples? Once the students learn the rule they can move onto the exceptions to the rule.

My homework for the weekend is to write a paragraph about what I'm going to do next year because we are practicing future tense. What? How about an assignment on what I'm going to do tomorrow? Here is how this paragraph will sound in English translation from the Polish words I know:

Next year, I will sleep. I will drink a beer. I will eat. I will read a newspaper. I will study. I will buy food.

How stupid is that?! Can we please have a shred of organization?

At 3 pm, the administration came to my room and told Teresa and I that we had to move, today. We've been asking them when we would have to move for the last two weeks, because we knew it was coming and we wanted to plan. However, they don't care about us having things to do and they decided to give us zero warning (and half a day). I was so proud of Teresa because she just looked at the girl and told her no. She said, "That's not good enough." She explained what she had to do and that she would be happy to move Monday, but not today. The girl told her that it was necessary, and she said, "Or what?" It was awesome. Then the woman looked at me like she couldn't believe I let Teresa talk to her like that. I just shrugged my shoulders because Teresa was right. Our flat mates were out and it is weird to pack up their shit. And that is exactly what they wanted us to do. Pack up our flatmates shit and carry all of it up 10 floors. Dumb, dumb, dumb. I have no problem moving because the rooms are nicer, but I'm not moving other people's stuff.

All I'm screaming is that I'm ready to get into a country that makes some sense. Then I'll put all these good ideas to work and make money instead of spending it all.

This is how the rest of the world perceives Americans.

I'm serious.

It huwt and it's still huwting me...

Kiss it! I hit my head on the cabinets that never stay closed. Right on the corner. I think I concussed myself. All things heal in time, but if you kiss this picture it will at least make me feel better.

Moving on, I made my international Thanksgiving dinner. The students here were so excited. I made mashed potatoes and gravy, green beans, corn, carrots, and peas. I bought rolls and, instead of a turkey, we had roasted chicken from the market. I don't know how we did it, but everything was hot when we sat down to eat. I gave one of my tear jerker speeches, and after dinner and dessert everyone played flip cup. There are pictures and videos on Facebook. It was a good evening.

Christmas is the next holiday I need to focus on. I was going with Teresa to her family's friends' house, but she just told me that it wasn't going to work. I'm going to see if there is someone else I can go with. I have to admit that I'm a little nervous. I'm going to keep my big girl pants on and my chin up. I'm sure that I can find someone to take me home with them. Who wouldn't want to have coffee with me on Christmas morning?

On a happier note, I am going to Paris and Barcelona! Plus, I'm almost out of money which means I can't do anything touristic there. I can only walk around, eat bread and cheese, and drink in the streets. Honestly, I never imagined that I would be going there this early in my life. Therefore, anything is better than nothing. Our hostel is near Monte Martre, or the artist district. We've had difficulty booking the train from Paris to Barcelona so we're a little concerned. We'll have to do it when we get there. I'll take lots of pictures of me looking cool and being awesome, and you all can tell me later that I look like I'm having a great time.

I'm one week shy of my third month coming to a close. I'm not dead and I'm mentally stable. I'm continuing to adjust and ignoring the fact that I'll have to readjust once I return. I look forward to all the correction of my forgotten language skills. Meanwhile, I have some scholarly articles that aren't going to read themselves. Don't forget to kiss the picture!